As Princeton's lone redneck (and I say it with pride), I was saddened and dissapointed that I somehow missed NY's Gay Pride Day this past summer. Thousands of fags, and I overlooked the opportunity to punch and kick even one of them into complete unconsciousness.
I'm really getting annoyed at the lack of support I'm getting from the Heteros (meaning normal people). Some say that senseless violence and boneheadism is no way to win people over politically. To them I say look at the last true American who had the cojones to heckle Obama in his health care speech. We need more people with the kind of guts to act completely out-of-line and idiotically at a major national function.
I do not lie! Take your pick: idiocy and the totally broken status quo or socialism?
I'll tell you how I handle foreigners. I ask for some gas in NJ, where they still have (often) Auslander pump jockeys. I wait for them to start pumping, then take my own gas can, pour the contents over give-them-a-chance and they'll be Osama's bodies, then watch them flare up like a Roman Candle.
This is usually pretty effective at scaring their friends and families, but for some reason (probably terrorist infiltration) the police usually come along and arrest me and put me in the slam.
All I can think about is what the Michigan Militia would think of this, and they are just what this country needs. Balding middle-aged men with paunches could save us all, if we just armed them with the latest and most advanced military technology that they have no idea how to use.
Don't tread on me, at least not before dinner.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment